You've seen What We're Not Writing... Now, whether you're a WGA member or a sympathizer with too much free time, let The Man know what you're not writing during the strike. E-mail us at, and we'll post it here:

"The REAL Monkeys"

A reality show. It stars ... me! I'm the manager of a rock band. I recruit four chimpanzees to play in the band. Each chimp has a very melodramatic back story. I do my best to teach them to play instruments. We go on tour, playing small rock clubs across the US of A. Backstage, I give the chimps lots of pep talks and raise false hopes that we're going to SXSW, and then we're gonna tour Europe and Japan. Also, there's lots of scenes of the boys flinging their monkey excrement at posters of Peter Tork, Michael Nesmith, Davey Jones, and the other guy. Because those dudes are not the REAL Monkeys. I am pitching the show to MTV and Animal Planet, and hoping to arrange an unprecedented deal where it gets shown on both networks.

...not written by Dave B.

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